Today was a great day. Madison exceled like she never has before. There was a light in her eyes that I had never seen before. I was feeling inept because I always have to Google and double check if her outside the box thinking is correct. 99.9% of the time it is, but I always Google to make sure she isn’t learning anything wrong.
And then bedtime came and the breakdown. Everything I have read about profoundly gifted kids issues came to fruition in a matter of minutes and it killed me.
Madison: Mom, why can’t I be normal? Why am I gifted? Why can’t I think like everyone else? Can’t I be normal now and gifted later? I can’t help who I am and I don’t fit in. I just want to be a doctor and I don’t know enough yet to be able to. I wish I could learn faster and just take the acceptance test. No one my age likes me for who I am. I can’t connect with anyone. My brain doesn’t work the same. I can’t talk to anyone my age because they don’t understand. I need to find kids my age that think like I do. Why aren’t there any? The kids at Mensa are mostly older boys and I feel weird trying to talk to them. I want to talk to older kids, but they don’t want to talk to me because I’m 7. My friends from school don’t understand. (She recently saw some friends from her public school at an extra curricular evening activity.) They don’t understand how awful my teacher in school was, so why was it so bad for me? I had to endure my teacher hating me for a whole year….why me? They don’t use their imagination all they want to do is play hide and seek…..why am I different? How am I ever going to be understood? No one gets me.
I was completely thrown off guard and was not expecting this talk. So I pointed out that it was completley normal and she needed to focus on the positives. I pointed out that a couple of her homeschool friends liked to play while using their imagination and she agreed. I explained this was a downfall for being asynchronous, but we would work through it and it would be ok.
I asked her if any of the teachers she had in her extra curricular activities were like her First Grade teacher. She answered they weren’t. I explained we were doing the best we could right now and that I understood everything she was saying. That it was normal for her to feel that way and we would work through it and I’d figure out ways to make it better.
So that’s my mission now. Wish me luck. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. All I want is for her to be happy.